This title may be downloaded from Audible via Amazon
Julian North
My whole world changed with one roadside bomb and an honorable discharge. Not even the city I used to love can ease the restlessness inside me. I don’t expect visiting my cousin Sienna’s farm to do the trick, either, but the change of scenery can’t hurt.
Wyoming isn’t what I expected – from the mischievous pig following me around, to the rescue horse I’ve become strangely fascinated with. And then, there’s Kerry, the handsome, brooding cowboy, who somehow calms the storm inside me – and just happens to be Sienna’s ex-husband.
Kerry Carmichael
I’ve had a rough go of it since I came out – disappointing my family, the divorce, and the blow of my daughter’s illness. Things are settling down now, my kiddo is healthy, and Sienna and I are finally on solid ground. Not everyone accepts me, but I’ve owned my truth, even if I spend my life solo. Only, now that Julian’s here, I’m not so lonesome, anymore. He’s a kindred spirit. First as someone to talk to, then as…more. The first time I hold him through one of his nightmares, I feel a rightness I never expected to find.
We know this’ll end with the summer, but with every stolen kiss against the stable walls, with every heated or tender moment, I fall deeper. The reality is, I can’t risk my family or the business by going public with him. I know this can never last and that Julian doesn’t belong here. So, why does it feel like he already does?
Rating: Narration – A-; Content – B+
Christina Lee’s Have Mercy is a “quiet” book; a simple but heartfelt slow-burn romance between two men who are struggling to find their place in the world. It’s the first time I’ve listened to anything by this author, but I plan to seek out more of her work on the strength of it. Audible shows me that Iggy Toma and Kale Williams have both narrated for her, so I feel a glom coming on.
Military veteran Julian North completed two tours in Afghanistan before being injured in the roadside bomb attack that killed two of his comrades. Left with a dodgy knee and scars – both internal and external – he’s been back in New York for a year, but he’s struggling to find a new direction in life. His mother, a successful real estate agent, has been keeping him busy with a variety of jobs requested by some of her clients, but they both know he can’t just drift along like that indefinitely. Then she suggests that perhaps he might go to stay with his cousin Sienna at her dairy farm in Wyoming to help out with a construction project – a change of scenery and pace for a few weeks, plus a concrete task to work on could be just the thing he needs. Julian allows himself to be convinced, although he’s not too keen on re-encountering Sienna’s ex-husband Kerry, who hurt her badly when he came out as gay a few years into their marriage. But even though he dislikes Kerry for what he did to Sienna, Julian can’t help feeling just a little bit of admiration for the man, given how difficult it must have been to come out while living amid the very conservative ranching community.
Kerry Carmichael was brought up on his family’s cattle ranch which is where he and Sienna lived until they turned some of the land into what is now Firefly Farm and went to live there. They raise cows, goats and chickens – none of which are “manly” enough for Kerry’s father and older brother – and take in the odd rescue horse, too. Kerry and Sienna had been best friends, then married right out of high school, and for a time, he’d hoped their friendship and a shared vision for their farm and their future would be enough, that he could be the husband Sienna deserved. But a few years after their daughter Ainsley was born, living a lie became impossible and Kerry had to own his truth; but just as he and Sienna were on the verge of completing their divorce, Ainsley was diagnosed with leukaemia and their priorities changed. Ainsley’s now been in remission for over a year, but although Kerry and Sienna are no longer married, they continue to run the farm and live under the same roof, having agreed not to break up their family while making sure Ainsley understood they were no longer a couple.
Although Julian and Kerry are attracted to each other from the beginning, both men are cautious given the complicated family situation. Ever since his coming out and the divorce, Kerry has been made to feel like an outcast in his own family, which, he feels, is nothing less than he deserves for what he put Sienna through. He’s put his life on hold to look after his daughter and his ex, and believes he doesn’t deserve love or happiness on his own account, but Julian helps him to realise he’s allowed to have both those things and to live his life rather than just going through the motions.
Julian is pleasantly surprised at how quickly he – a city dweller all his life – adapts to and enjoys life on the farm, relishing the work and forming friendships with the people who work there. His PTSD is realistically portrayed and is incorporated in a subtle way, so we’re aware it’s ever-present in his life but it never overwhelms the rest of the story or becomes a main focus. His time at the farm doesn’t effect a magical cure, but it does help him learn to manage it better, and the connections he forms – with Kerry, with Ainsley, who has developed severe anxiety following her illness, and a rescue horse (the titular Have Mercy) – are both touching and important in that process.
The romance between the two men is a gorgeous slow-burn, their intense chemistry fuelling a very gradual, organic move from initial attraction to beautifully written longing to something much deeper as they grow to understand each other through their various conversations and interactions.
There’s a well-drawn secondary cast here, from the other farm workers to Kerry’s (mostly) disapproving family, and I really appreciated that Sienna isn’t a one-note angry ex but a nuanced character with issues of her own as she attempts to move on with her life as well.
Nick J. Russo is one of my favourite narrators and he delivers an excellent performance that really hits all the right emotional notes in this heart-warming story. His smoothly modulated voice is easy on the ear and as I’d expect from such an experienced performer, his pacing, vocal characterisation and differentiation are excellent. Julian and Kerry are easy to tell apart aurally, with Julian’s voice pitched slightly higher than Kerry’s deep rumble, and he portrays the female characters believably and consistently. He does a good job with Ainsley as well – I often think it must be difficult to voice children convincingly, but if it is, he gives no sign of it! Where really earns the brownie points though, is in the way he conveys the depth of the connection between the two leads and in his interpretation of the moments of raw, heart-breaking emotion, which are beautifully delivered.
Have Mercy is a moving and emotional story, and although it tackles some serious issues, it’s never bogged down in misery or overblown angst. The characters are fully-rounded, the family dynamics are complex and realistic and the romance is simply lovely; I enjoyed it a lot and am more than happy to recommend it.
This review originally appeared at AudioGals.
Caz's Reading Room 